I'm 2 too.

My two- year old son started pre-school today.
A few days ago, in anticipation of this day, I felt sad.

Well, not sad, I'd say sentimental.

This morning, after throwing a match box car at his sister, smearing his banana all over the dining room floor while laughing, and screaming out the window, standing on a dangerous step stool ladder; I was no longer feeling sentimental.

Then it was on with his back pack filled with diapers, thinking woo hoo! One less shitty diaper for me to change today.
BTW, this is not a new back pack, (first sign of second child syndrome). It was his sister's back pack. So, naturally, I took a big sharpie and crossed out her name and replaced it with his name- real classy.
Way to make the first day of school special.
I would have actually cared what the teachers thought when I started emma in preschool. But at this point, I could give a flying fuck.
I think with the second, all bets are off, and I can't imagine what would happen with the third. I Hope I don't find out.

After running after him throughout the house trying to get his shoes and socks on, convincing him we were NOT playing hide and seek, we were almost ready to go.
I also did try to take a picture for his first day, but he ran around the living room yelling NO!NO Pictooore! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
See why I'm so sentimental?

What a crock of shit.
Should I really make him take the picture? No, I'll just take the damn picture of the real moment- Here's my obstinent two year old's first day of school....... Click click.
And no, I'm not posting it in FB with a cute caption about how sad I am.

Now I'll Cut to, the pre-school open house last week. I went to meet the teachers. It was an open house of sorts where you and your child hang out in the class room, pretending like life is grand. You are also asked to fill out a meaningless questionnare, with questions like, "how will we know if your child is upset?" and, "what are your child's favorite foods?"
My answers were: he will scream, cry, or throw a tantrum. He likes milk and mostly throws all his FOOD on the floor.
Oh, and don't worry, I left out the part about how he loves to remove his diaper and then walks around with shit on his hands, and sometimes smears it on a wall.

There were many polite introductions with screaming two year olds who were not sharing trucks and blocks. Everyone was smiling, while trying to manage their small animals/2 year-olds. "Come on sweetie, share with your new friend." Underneath that smile was a tired, worn down mom like myself... excited to be leaving my child with another sorry sac for three hours a day, three days a week.

There is always that chipper mom who "LOVES this age", that I just can't relate to.
Oh, and yes, she was at the open house.
Her son was a genius, not that she said that, but you could just tell by the way he played with his blocks.
"He knows 24 signs!" she said gleefully.
Wow, I thought, 24!I guess you have time to count them.
Don't judge Stacie, don't judge I thought to myself.
Then she said, "He also doesn't really get that upset, he will point or sign for what he needs!" She told the teacher.
Spare me, I thought, he's two years old.... If a two year points at anything, isn't he screaming at the same time?

Okay, my higher self vanished after that comment.

Must be nice, I thought, I guess he's also potty trained and he can fucking read?

"He also speaks two languages," she said.

Last straw.

Wait a second, did she really just say that out loud?
EYE ROLL, and I don't care if she saw me, I live with a 2 year old.
I too have regressed.
I am 2 now too.